Holy cow it has been awhile! And that is my fault and there are a million reasons (or excuses) I could choose to list, but I would rather just start fresh in 2014.

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Probably starting in November, I began to feel a little stuck with life. I was restless just using my brain only for work, winter and grey skies had arrived, and my apartment was almost fully set up. I realized how many months had slipped by since I had arrived in Winnipeg and how easy it is to get caught up in the wake up, go to work, come home, make dinner, watch tv/ read a book/ phone a friend, go to bed. And repeat.

I let myself enjoy Christmas back in BC, but when I got home in January I realized I needed to work through this. Call it a quarter-life crisis, a spoiled twenty-something, the winter blues, an unnecessary worrywart moment, whatever you will. But for the past two years people kept telling me to worry about finding a job and living on my own. Now that I have figured out those pieces, I realize they weren’t the hardest. The most difficult part is what comes next when there is no structure, no five year goal to get the bachelor’s degree done, just (endless) life. And me.

And maybe you, dear reader, already knew this. But I did not. No one mentioned this part and I really wish everyone would spend some on it with graduating students (unless I am the exception). Or maybe this is what they call “growing up” and I should get over it?

Regardless, I had a really great chat with Amber and she said many wise things including that it was okay to just feel it. So I did. And this is what I learned:

  1. Last year if I was asked to introduce myself I would immediately answer with comments about work, school, volunteer, awards, conferences, and more. Being new to Winnipeg this year I have to introduce myself a lot and all I can say is I’m an event planner. After identifying with so many different things in the past, I feel like I have lost my identity.
  2. Amber told me I need to find things I love outside of my job – that is so true. For so long everything I have done was about setting myself up for the best university graduation/ job hunt possible. I love United Way, my job, and the non-profit sector. But when some days are a little too much,  I need to be able to come home and find joy in things that are all mine. And so comes Amy 2.0. Maybe everything up until now was just the preparation. Now I have to figure out who I really am.

February for me is my birthday month which makes it extra special. But I also want it to be about cleaning (getting rid of every damn box I still have left to unpack), organizing myself for financial success (downloading YNAB and setting up a plan to end all debt and save up for a rainy day), and goal-setting (using Lara Casey’s tips and what works best for me).

I’m done being stuck in a rut so follow along as I move forward and please, share the love and advice!

  • girlwiththeredhair

    Actually something I didn’t talk about when we chatted but I JUST thought of that I think you would both enjoy doing and find really insightful is making a vision board! I bet that would help you a lot.

    And the other thing to remember, that I really came to understand and accept over the last year, is this is life. And those little things day to day? They add up to the big things at the end of your life. So try to enjoy and relish in the little moments as much as the big ones right now. I know you’re doing a great job of that as you get used to your new home but even something as “small” as having a really great dinner while watching your favourite TV show and feeling so utterly settled, happy and relax is a little moment that deserves to be celebrated right along side the big ones like getting a job, graduating etc. etc.

    Give yourself time, it will all come together.

    Love you! XO

  • http://lemonthistle.com/ Colleen Pastoor

    I’ve been there! I remember coming home from work and thinking that that’s it… that’s what the rest of my life will be like. When you don’t have all those school activities to fill your schedule- working is really it (other than hobbies!).

    But I agree with Amber, learning to love the little things like a night in and not needing every moment to be an adventure or working towards an end goal makes life so much more enjoyable.

    And your February sounds a-mazing. Budgeting and organizing make me giddy- enjoy it!